Psycho Boy Jack

In my dreams last night, I graphically cut left hand off, from just above the wrist. I remember sawing bone and sinew and how much it hurt. I woke up wild and scared and as it turns out, unmaimed. While I really have to blame Aron Ralston's book for some of this, I always look up my more vivid dreams, out of curiosity. I know that dream interpretation is kind of like horoscopes. You project your own reality and meanings onto them, but I still find them interesting.

AMPUTATION:
To dream that your limbs are amputated signifies abandoned talents and serious, permanent losses. It indicates your feelings of frustration, powerlessness and helplessness. Sometimes amputation may also represent a situation that you have been ignoring and has finally reached a crisis point. In particular, to dream that your arms are amputated suggests that you lack motivation.

WRIST:
To see an injured or bandaged wrist in your dream indicates a loss in productivity. You are in an imbalanced or one-sided relationship. In particular, if your wrists that are injured, then it implies that you are not reaching out to others enough. -- Dreammoods.com

These seem to relate to my general feelings of quarter-life crisis-ism. Laura and I have had small conversations about how no one is defined merely by what they do as a profession. Lately all I can think about as I'm topping mochas with whipped cream, or ringing in someone's toilet paper, cough drops and condoms is about how many thousands of dollars I paid to have a diploma I'm not using. How I am capable of more than what I'm committing myself to. How I'm too young to have hit such a disenchanted wall with reality. (After my psychotic dream episode, I laid in bed and thought..."Moving back into your hometown after college is probably why people start doing stupid things like recreational drugs.") So maybe my brain knows a thing or two that I don't and it's trying to jumpstart me into realizing and acting on what I already know in the back of my mind.

Hopefully I'll have some good news to report sooner or later in this respect, and less crazy self-surgical dreams.

In other news, hopefully I'll have some not vague lame rambly posts about my confusion with life at this point coming up very soon. Saturday, I may be going to my first ever poetry open mic/slam with my friend Justin, and on Monday Jill is coming home from working in another city for five weeks. We're starting a two week 'clean eating' challenge to help us refocus our goals and eat better just in time for the 10K . Did I mention I'm all signed up for that officially now? (Holy shit.) It's like being strapped into a roller coaster. I KNOW I can do it, but I need to know if I can do it well. ALSO, the issue of Travis that I wrote my 10K article in will be published soon. Did I forget to mention I had to go to a real photoshoot for it? I think I did forget to mention that. Oh well. EXCITING TIMES!

It'll be good blog fodder, that's fo' shizzle.

And now for your viewing pleasure, a video I took of Costello's cat shenanigans over the summer.